Weird thing about making lists. It's primarily a male-dominated practice and the list is never finished.

Not long ago, I asked the question: What living American is the absolute best at what he or she does for a living?

I gave my Top 5. But after further review, my list, as it turns out, sucked.

New Top 5:

1) Oprah Winfrey. Never watch her, but boy is she the master? If there's an American who could start her own brainwashing cult, it's Oprah… Wait… What I meant to say was, ‘now there's an American with her own brainwashed cult.'
2) Tiger Woods. He dominates a sport that was never meant to be dominated. I love the old-timers who still cling to the argument that Jack Nicklaus was better. Yah and typewriters were better than computers.
3) Daniel Day Lewis. Amazing. And considering he's such a flaky weirdo in real life, his roles display that here's a guy who's really acting. Could you imagine the lovable but limited Vince Vaughn playing Bill the Butcher in Gangs of New York?
4) Vin Scully… Sorry if this vague reference holds no significance for you. Baseball fans know the name. He's the long-time play-by-play broadcaster for the Los Angeles Dodgers, and he is quite simply perfect at his job.
5) My masseuse. You're just going to have to trust me.

Blog at you later.
chuck

I hate to have to go back in time to fix a wrong, but I feel I must…

Wednesday's Question of the Day was: Among the many creepy television commercials currently running, which is the creepiest?"

Well, I regret to inform all those who participated in the poll, we got it wrong. Look, it's not that I don't appreciate the effort shown. There were some terrific answers. The Boost Mobile Hair Growing from Woman's Armpit Ad. The Geico Money Stack Ads. The Chocolate Axe Guy being Eaten by Ravenous College Girls Ad.

Of course, the winning votes belonged to any and all Burker King ads featuring the King. Yes, it's now official, the King is creepier than Gary Bussey in a Catholic school girl uniform. HOWEVER, he's not the creepiest thing on TV. No, that title belongs to the Quizno's toaster oven. You see, we forgot about the Quizno ad featuring what is apparently a gay toaster oven attempting to coax a young male employee to have sex with it. I have included a link to the ad, in case you feel the need to confirm or refute my decision. If you watch casually, you'll no doubt notice the oven asks young Scott to take his footlong Toasted Torpedo sandwich and, I'm quoting here, "Stick it in me". But if you watch the ad carefully, you'll notice that at the beginning, the oven suggests it wants a favor, to which Scott replies, while looking down at his crotchal region, "No way, I'm not doing that again. That burned."



Apparently, heavy-handed machine-man sexual connotation sells sandwiches. Who knew?

And apparently, creepy, in general, moves product. I'm not entirely sure what ad research is revealing about the consumer these days, but I for one am not comfortable with it.

Blog at you later.
chuck

So who's your final two?

Well, judging by the body of their work this season, it should be Adam Lambert and (insert finals loser here).

However!

If the show is truly a weekly competition, a battle of survival, Lambert should be gone after this week's performances.

Two reasons for this:

1. Kris and Danny stepped up big! I would argue they both had their best weeks of the season and when it mattered most. Had you heard Allen's version of "Apologize" by One Republic without having heard the original first, you would have sworn the guy had a #1 hit on his hand. Okay, so he didn't play with it a lot. You can also play with a song too much (see Adam Lambert's version of U2's One). As for Gokey, aside from the kind of dancing you'd see at every Milwaukee wedding reception, he was good last night. And I'm not even a fan. I thought he vocally nailed the Terrence Trent Darby song. He should put that tune into the rotation when he's the headline performer in the drink lounge at Imperial Palace.

2. Adam Lambert's weaknesses are his tendencies to overdo his high notes, perform theatrically and apply foundation excessively. Well last night he took the cake makeup in all three categories. Wholeheartedly disagreeing with the judges, who basically begged listeners to vote for Lambert Tuesday night, I think Lambert took WAY too much liberty with U2's classic "One." I don't care if it did make his Mom cry (I've made my Mom cry plenty of times). Additionally, I didn't realize what an amazing singer Steven Tyler truly is, until I heard Lambert and Gokey ATTEMPT to pull off Aerosmith in each of the last two weeks.

Now all that being said, I don't think Lambert was bad last night. I just don't think Jet Eyeliner was particularly good and he picked a bad week not to be. I truly believe he's been the best performer this season, that he should advance and ultimately win the title. My point is: IF this is a weekly competition, Lambert finished third out of three last night. IF American Idol's judging is not rigged (as believed in most of my circles), Lambert could be in trouble Wednesday night.

So what would I like to see happen?

Allen and Lambert advance. Paula loses her balance and falls into a pool of man-eating bass.

What do I think will happen?

Lambert and Gokey advance. Kara over-enunciates her analyses.

Should be interesting. Blog at you later.

chuck

Star Trek made a crap-load of money this weekend. For your money, what group currently lays claim to the title of "world's biggest geeks"?

Put another blog on the fire for me. Email me here OR tweet me here.

chuck

If the World Wide Web was to run out of space, what's the one site you'd fight to keep and what's the one site you'd organize a petition to dump?

Blog me in the Blog Cabin. Email me (chuck@987thepeak.com) or tweet me (chuckpowell987).

I happen to think Keanu Reeves is worse at his job than any person in America. I mean, sure, there could be a stockboy in Des Moines who's yet to transfer a single can of cream corn to its proper shelf without breaking it first, but I'm not privy to that man's professional failures, where Keanu Reeves' poor work history is a product of public record.

But for today's Question of the Day, I would like to remain positive. I would like to know what living person you feel is best at their job in all of America.

You can recommend someone famous or someone you know.

For example, my short list includes (in order).

1. Oprah
2. Daniel Day Lewis
3. Simon Cowell
4. Detour Dan Beach
5. Alton Brown (Food Network host)

Tell me what you think… Would love to get people's opinions.

Blog me or tweet me.

chuck

Now let me preface this by saying, I know this sounds crazy, but can a seemingly gay man from American Idol revive Rock N' Roll?

...No not Ryan Seacrest. I'm talking about Adam Lambert.

Whether any of us want to admit or not, American Idol is a dominant force in the music world. Oh sure Taylor Hicks was a bigger bust than Cop Rock and Ryan Leaf. But for every Taylor Hicks, there's a Kelly Clarkson. Hell, Carrie Underwood is the biggest star in country music (and the other four artists in country music are pissed about it).

It's not that American Idol is seasonally uncovering the greatest musical talent in America, it's that artists like Daughtry receive three months of free P-R that has no match in the industry. And now, now the show's actually stumbled upon an amazing talent. Through all his theatrics, eyeliner and the wearing of the tight pants, Adam Lambert has a huge, effortless voice. The knock on him has been he has no fit in mainstream music. His future seems better suited for Broadway than Broad Appeal. That is, until last night.

In all honesty, last week I was sitting in my living room watching Idol (for show reasons of course) and I thought to myself, I'd like to hear this guy sing Guns N' Roses. Well, sure as Shinola, this week turns out to be classic Rock week. Despite Slash's presence as guest coach, Lambert does not choose a GNR song. No, he embarks upon a far greater challenge. Axel Rose, Schmaxel Rose, Lambert had the never-been-touched-by-a-girl balls to sing Robert Plant. Robert Plant! What person in the right mind tries to sing Robert Plant on national television and to an audience comprised mostly of housewives, teenage girls and radio show host(s)?

But here's the kicker... Dude kills it! Knocked it out of the park. Scratched it's eyes out with his long, black fingernails. Adam Lambert finally found his niche and it happens to be the material from the greatest era of music in history (all apologies to Mozart). Zeppelin, Rolling Stones, Beatles. Was it ever better? It certainly hasn't been since.

Wouldn't it be flat crazy if a gay guy from a televised talent show used the PR machine that is American Idol to revive Rock n' Roll? If Lambert takes what's her name's advice and makes a brand new classic rock album, you know it will sell. The question will be, can classic rock catch on with America's youth while simultaneously catching on with the genre's core fans who may or not be able to overlook Lambert's girl-hair.

It will certainly be interesting to see.

As for the rest of the show, I thought Danny Gokey's performance of "Dream On" was flat horrible this week. The judges ripped his final blood-curdling note, where I was more concerned with his Mel Tormey (sp?) doo-doo-dadoo-doo scat he put in the middle of Aerosmith's "Dream On"! For that he should go… But he won't.

The judges teamed up on Kris Allen last night. He was certainly out of his comfort zone last night. It must stink to get this far and get tripped up by the last kind of music you should sing. Had it come up earlier in the season, he wouldn't have flown through the round. But with only four left?

Allen was outperformed by his duet partner Danny Gokey last night, but Gokey should have erased all memory of that victory with his show-closing cat screeching.

I think Kris Allen's a goner tonight. And you can hold me to it.

Blog at you later.
chuck

The first U.S. double hand transplant took place this week. For the first time in 54 years, Pittsburgh's Jeff Keppner woke up with hands. How cool is that?

But it got me wondering. If you knew tomorrow was the first day you'd have hands, what's the first thing you'd want do with them?

Feel free to be as sincere, funny or analytical as you want. I won't judge.

Email me or send me a tweet.

Chuck

There are many questions that when asked of a random sampling of people will almost invariably end in a 50-50 split…

1. Maryann or Ginger?
2. Elvis or The Beatles?
3. Nancy Kerrigan or Tanya Harding?
4. Heads or Tails?

I think I might have another one. But let's test it out.

Here's your 50-50 question of the day:

In honor of Cinco de Mayo, if given the choice (money being no object) between sit down Mexican food (Catina Laredo, Frank & Lupe's, Los dos Molinos, etc.) or Mexican fast food (Taco Bell, Del Taco, the Berto's family of Mexican restaurants), what would you choose? And a brief explanation why?


Today's results:
68% Mexican Sit Down
32% Mexican Fast Food

chuck

Throw another blog on the fire and tell me "What is the one thing as an Arizonan you're embarrassed you haven't done, seen or experienced within the state?" Click Here.

All blogs will be ranked. The best will be posted and read on the air. Let the Blog Cabin open. Let's put some blogs on the fire!

As of this day, May 4th, 2009, I still have not seen the Grand Canyon.

As an Arizonan of ten years, one of the Eight Natural Wonders of the World is located in my backyard and I've yet to take the drive to see it. Well, it's embarrassing.

I mean, are there 37-year old Egyptians who've not taken the time to visit the Great Pyramids? I doubt it.

My sister's family is in town. We were supposed to go this weekend to see the Canyon. However, I remembered that I was scheduled to host a charity auction and had to back out. I'm certainly glad I went to the fundraiser. We raised a lot of money for cancer patients. I had a terrific time. The only down side is that I'm an Arizonan and I've still yet to see the Grand Canyon, not even a Clark Griswold-esque drive-by viewing.

How many Nashvillians haven't been to Dollywood? Probably none.

Perhaps I require a shot of urgency. After all, I've always been sort of a procrastinator. In college, I waited until the night before to start and finish term papers. I grew up near St. Louis and it took learning that I was moving to Las Vegas to motivate me into going up into the Gateway Arch for the first time. Maybe fear of swine flu will send us all scampering north to dwell in the Dakotas and on the way out of the state I'll swing passed the Grand Canyon for a quick mule ride. I'm an Arizonan. I should have seen the Grand Canyon by now.

Do you think anyone living in Darwin, Minnesota hasn't taken the time to drive by the world's largest ball of twine? Hell no.

The weirdest part is that I have family members who rarely step foot outside of Illinois and they've seen the Grand Canyon. My Dad rarely takes a breath from singing its praises. (Picture a man who looks like a bald Willie Nelson saying this with a lazy, breathy midwestern drawl) "Every centimeter the sun drops changes the entire landscape. Why I could go see the Grand Canyon every day for the rest of my life and every time would seem like the first time," he carries on. Of course my dad is to nature what Dick Vitale is to college basketball.

Still, I can't help but wonder if my having not seen the Grand Canyon is on par with a member of the Osbourne family not having taken the time to meet Ozzy. Wouldn't curiosity get the best of you in ten years time?

Well, the bottom line is, I need to go. In fact, I need to schedule the trip as I'm typing this. I've been to Sedona. I've been to Tombstone. I've been to Babe's Cabaret. So yah, I've seen all of Arizona's great natural and man-made wonders, except for the big one. The Grand Damn Canyon!

If there's something you haven't done as an Arizonan that embarrasses you, please "throw another Blog on the fire". Chuck's Blog Cabin is open for business.

chuck

Throw another blog on the fire and tell me "What is the one thing as an Arizonan you're embarrassed you haven't done, seen or experienced within the state?" Click Here.

All blogs will be ranked. The best will be posted and read on the air. Let the Blog Cabin open. Let's put some blogs on the fire!